Common Difficulties I See In Therapy
We use different words for things we struggle with in life. Words like difficulties, disorders, mental health concerns, diagnoses, problems, or worries. In the end, whatever word we use, it means we are struggling and could use some help. As a clinical psychologist, I can spot symptoms, cluster them together and formulate a diagnosis. This is usually helpful if you need additional support like medication or a targeted treatment plan for panic attacks. Using a diagnosis communicates what’s going on for you when I write a letter to your GP or other professional giving input into your care.
Why Men Struggle With Asking For Help
I know we suck at a lot of things. Sometimes I’m astounded by our petty wilfulness around asking for help. Somehow, being a man in midlife makes it worse. We feel that we should know the answers and act like the responsible adults we never were. So, asking for help can feel embarrassing and surprisingly attacking on the little misplaced pride we tenderly cultivate like special mushrooms in the basement of our brains.
How to manage your feelings without shutting down or blowing up
We often think of “managing our feelings” as something that involves controlling them — getting a grip, calming down, moving on. But the reality is more complex — and far more useful.
The way through a difficult feeling is not around it, but through it. That idea shows up again and again in the work I do with clients — the moment someone stops trying to argue their way out of an emotion and instead lets themselves actually feel it is almost always the moment something shifts. Either the feeling changes – or their relationship to the feeling does. Emotions aren’t static to be managed away. They’re information. And the way we resist them tends to cause far more suffering than the feelings themselves.
The Mini Unblend in Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy: A Simple Way to Come Back to Yourself
Sometimes your inner world very, very crowded. Maybe you’re in a moment of anger, self-criticism, craving, replaying a conversation, worrying about tomorrow, and trying to work out what to do next. Like dominoes, one thought leads to another, and one feeling activates another. Before long, your whole system of parts can feel like it is in chaos.
This is a familiar experience in Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy. In IFS, we understand these experiences as times when parts have become blended with us.